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Confessions Of A Business Golfer

I have officially joined the ranks of golfers who play once a month. I was even called a former golf professional by my new business associate, and then I knew my golfing days were over. But wait, just like Jesper Parnevik, I refuse to run with the crowd and Im already finding ways to keep my game somewhat in shape even if Im not on the course. Now being the good sport that I am, Im sharing them with the world.

Theres good news if youre only hobby except golf is watching The Love Connection repeats on your Trinitron. This is probably the best time to practice a grip change, and as a former golf professional, believe you me, the vast majority of high handicap golfers are in need of a grip change. Now Im too busy admiring Chuck Woolerys presenting performance, but if you dive back into a past issue of OB Golf & Lifestyle, Im sure youll find some good grip advice from one of the teaching staff. Now just sit back, keep the remote close by, and pick up a club with your new grip. Waggle it around, and during commercials you may even get motivated to stand up in the golfers posture and see how it feels. Thats enough exercise though, sit back down but just keep gripping and re-gripping until that new grip feels as comfortable as the couch youre on.

Now, youre shopping with your wife, Im a bit of a chauvinist, so Im presuming youre male. Instead of feeling stupid and looking dumb while your wife is trying on that new Prada outfit, take a look around and what do see you lots of? Thats right. Mirrors. And the type of mirror that you can see your entire body, or in this case, golf stance in. In takes a little bit of nerve to pretend youve got a club in your hand and assume your golfing posture, but where else can you practice your posture amongst so many beautiful woman? Think you look stupid? No more stupid than you do trying to look like youre not staring at the hot looking mannequin, or holding your wifes handbag. Nobody will ever see you again (hopefully), so dont ever get impatient again waiting for your wife to buy clothes, its a great opportunity to perfect one of the most important aspects of a good golf swing.

Whats that? Youre a frequent flyer? Business Class I presume. Time to sharpen your mental skills. Recline that seat all the way. Close your eyes and slap on those sleep things that dont let in the light, whatever theyre called. Now, imagine your next game, you most likely know where it is. Youre standing on the tee, youre imagining everything from the weather to the feel of your new silk underwear with trunk pouch. You see the trees blowing gently in the breeze and you can even smell the grass. You go through your entire pre-shot routine and even feel a trickle running down your leg due to the overwhelming nervousness hitting a stationary little white ball with an instrument the size of a large gopher creates. You make contact and the ball takes off. Youre posing. Youre not wrong. You are the man. Its the best drive of your life. It happens time and time again and you shoot 78. Its the best round of your life and you did it without a golf club. Congratulations. Dont ever underestimate the power of visualization. All top players see the shot before it happens and just watch Michael Schumacher when hes on the grid before a race start if you think Ive been smoking more than Marlboroughs.

I beg your pardon? Whats that I hear you say? Stuck in the office the whole day? Well this is perhaps the best environment for sharpening your game outside the course itself. In front of a computer most of the day? Go googling online golf lessons and choose from one of the 6,390,000 pages of golf instruction. That could be a little too time consuming for most people, so if thats not your style, why not try sticking your head against a wall and practicing your putting stroke. Now, the secret is to not move your head, which is one of the most common mistakes golfers make. If the boss asks you what youre doing, just tell them your doctor gave you the exercise to help your RSI. If you are the boss, everybody thinks youre not all there anyway and wont bother to ask.

Even the most common of everyday tasks can be turned into little golfing exercises. Lets say you need to empty last nights curry. Instead of taking the tissue from the roll, stash it in your back pocket and pretend youre taking the scorecard out while crouching down to view the break on a putt. Be careful though, standing up could cause disastrous results. Dropped something? Before you bend down to pick it up, you can practice hiking up your trousers and pretending youre retrieving the ball after making a birdie. Upon standing up, dont forget to tip your cap and give the crowd a little nod and wave. New to golf, and in a store with just 3 others? Why not practice staying out of their line of sight. Imagine youre on the putting green, pick a hole, and be careful not to stand on their line. Walking down a crowded street? Why not practice your 18th hole farewell or victory walk? No, you may not ever have the chance, but a crowded street is as close as youll probably get. Rent a Jack Nicklaus video and study his acknowledging waves and gestures. Do the same when youre walking home during rush hour. Dont worry about the look people give you, youre famous and have just won the Masters so what do you care anyway?